What is your handshake saying about you?  In the first few seconds that you meet someone, even if you know them, you speak volumes about your self the moment you connect with the other person's hand.  Check your style below and see if you need to do a little adjusting to your own handshake.

The man's handshake Often when a man is shaking another man's hand, he thinks that their shake needs to be overly firm.  This is not so!  A firm yet comfortable shake is all that's needed to connect.  Be aware! If your handshake is too strong it may be painful!  And unnecessary. 

The woman's shake While it is an everyday occurrence to see a woman shaking a man's hand when they meet, it is not always done from one woman to another woman.  However this shake is important to do and do properly, especially in a business setting.  Women should be careful that their handshake is not wimpy.  One other point is that often women will embrace other women if they know each other well.  Be careful with this in a business setting as an embrace may be ok but not always perceived as professional enough in some settings.

In some cases the woman will need to be the initiator of a handshake by offering her hand to a male counterpart. Some men are still unsure about what to do when meeting a woman in the business arena.  Go ahead and help them out ladies.  They'll be grateful to you for the added assistance.

The man to woman handshake Sometimes a man will shake a woman's hand very lightly, just barely touching the tips of the fingers. From a woman's perspective, this handshake is sometimes seen as wimpy.  This type of shake may come from the man or sometimes from the woman.  Women, be careful here not to automatically choose an overly gentle shake.  It just may be perceived as making a subtle statement about who  holds the power in the shake that you didn't intend to make.  Most men don't expect to be greeted by a "weak" hand and neither should you.  Men, be careful here too and be sure that you are not offering a gentle shake without thinking.  Firm yet comfortable here is the desired comfort level.

Follow the 10 good handshake techniques below to ensure that your shake is effective and makes the right statement about you.
 

• Web's meeting - Be sure to have the "web" between thumb and index finger meet during the shaking process.  It is one way to make a real connection!  Aim for firm but not crushing hand pressure.
   
  
• The Squeeze - Watch the pressure here.  A grip that is too tight hurts whether you are male or female.
   
  
• The Closer - Don't close your hand too soon.  Allow the other person to give you their entire hand.  If the other person closes their hand too soon on yours, then you can help them by using your free hand and moving their arm closer to you.  That way you can ensure that the hands connect closer together.
  
  
• The Holder  Watch how long you hold the hand.  Too long and you may make the other person feel like a captive; too short and you may leave the other person wondering why you don't want to connect with them.  You don’t want to leave the other person suffering from the "what's wrong with me" syndrome!
  
  
• The Mini Hand If this is you, male or female, keep you fingers open when shaking so your hand feels bigger to the other person…and you too.
  
  
• The Clam  If you have clammy hands it is generally uncomfortable for the other person.  You might want to try drying your hands before offering them in a shake.  Try a quick wipe on a paper towel or napkin in your pocket or leave them out of your pocket to allow the air to keep them dry. 
   
  
• Cold as Ice -   Yikes!  If you have naturally cold hands try warming them by placing them in your pocket for a few minutes or rubbing them together quickly to get the blood flowing.
  
  
• Wet hands - Take steps to ensure that your hands are dry.  A towel or napkin in your pocket or purse can help here. 
  
  
• The Double -  Either with or without the other arm grabbing the shoulder  - While this type of arm pumping shake often comes with an enthusiastic great to see you! comment, this shake is not a good idea.  You leave the other person feeling overwhelmed and a little like a captive.  Save this shake for the uncle you haven't seen in 10 years who shows up at the family reunion unexpectedly.

• The Ghost  This shake is barely felt.  Just the tips of fingers shake with no web meeting or hand pressure at all. In an effort to avoid this type of shake, be cognizant of not closing your hand too soon.  If it happens to you use your other hand to guide their arm closer so that you can make a better connection. 
  

The bottom line to make a good impression with your handshake, make it firm with the two webs meeting but not exerting too much pressure.  Remember, you will make an impression when you meet others.  The question is do you want to do all you can to ensure that the impression you make is the one you intended to make?  I suggest you start with a great handshake.

About HR Performance Solutions:

HR Performance Solutions is focused on helping individuals improve their communication style both personally and professionally.  We work with clients looking to improve their skills as a leader and speaker.  With over 20 years of experience in a corporate environment, HR Performance Solutions, LLC offers our clients support  in training and mentoring teams in the public/private sectors, ensuring best HR practices are being followed and providing individuals with the coaching tools to successfully handle career transitions.  HR Performance Solutions' founder Linda Trignano is focused on helping companies more effectively handle their people related functions. We help businesses increase employee value by leveraging our expertise in human resources and communications to ensure that clients incorporate HR "best practices" into their business.  HR Performance Solutions brings a unique approach to its clients. By integrating problem identification, action plan development and employee acceptance into every engagement, we produces results that drive company profits and value.     

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